DAY 5: GIVING AND RECEIVING

Whenever there is a breakdown in marriage, it is likely that one spouse feels like they are giving into a bottomless pit without receiving anything in return. Such a dynamic in marriage may be the result of temporary circumstances or tendencies rooted in personality traits.

When we read the story of Ruth, we find her in a season of one-sided giving (Ruth 1-2). While Naomi, Ruth’s mother-in-law, was mourning the death of her husband and sons, Ruth was responsible for providing for them both. And from the sound of it, Ruth had to give more than just working full days in the sun to pick up leftover grain. Naomi also needed emotional support and encouragement despite Ruth’s own grief. “‘Don’t call me Naomi,’ she responded.’Instead, call me Mara, for the Almighty has made life very bitter for me. I went away full, but the Lord has brought me home empty…’” (Ruth 1:20-21, NLT). Ruth represented God’s image by providing comfort to Naomi.

Fortunately, Ruth’s season of bottomless giving did not last forever. Boaz’s kindness and generosity changed Ruth’s position to the other side of giving (Ruth 4). In order to become one of the great-grandmothers of Jesus, Ruth had to obey God’s plan by allowing Boaz to be the selfless giver. “So Boaz took Ruth into his home, and she became his wife…Then the women of the town said to Naomi, ‘Praise the Lord, who has now provided a redeemer for your family!’” (Ruth 4:13-14, NLT). Ruth’s humble acceptance of God’s divine provision reflected his image for generations to come.

Again, we also find Jesus on both sides of giving and receiving during his time on earth. Jesus gave everything He had to save us. “Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, He gave up his divine privileges; He took the humble position of a slave” (Philippians 2:6-7, NLT). And sometimes this humble attitude of Jesus had to be revealed through receiving from others. “When a certain immoral woman from that city heard he was eating there, she brought a beautiful alabaster jar filled with expensive perfume… Then she kept kissing his feet and putting perfume on them” (Luke 7:37-38, NLT).

Do you feel exhausted from giving in your marriage? Or do you feel humiliated from having to receive from your spouse all the time? How is God’s image being reflected through both of you?

Let us look for God’s image in our spouse when they seem to benefit more from the relationship than us. And let us celebrate God’s glory when we see his image reflected through all the differences in our marriages. “All of this is for your benefit. And as God’s grace reaches more and more people, there will be great thanksgiving, and God will receive more and more glory” (1 Corinthians 4:15, NLT).

Scripture readings:

Ruth 1:16-22

Ruth 4:13-22

Philippians 2:3-8

Luke 7:36-50

1 Corinthians 4:15